Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize