Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize