just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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