and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
