It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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