one might say we're banned from that church
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize