ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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