Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
