windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize