He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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