Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
