a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
