No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
