Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Randomize
