i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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