Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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