her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
