I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize