He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
