he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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