I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
