is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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