So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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