For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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