It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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