I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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