I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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