she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
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