I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
