You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
did i walk over a car last night?
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Randomize
