All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
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