We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
