Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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