What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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