party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
