I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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