He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
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