I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
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