hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
We don't watch enough power rangers
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
