If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
