i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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