69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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