in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize