i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I wish there were birth control emojis
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize