You don't have asthma, your pregnant
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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