btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Randomize
