she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
