the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
