I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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