question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
